Eavanne Beattie

50k for the babies I couldn't bring home

I'm not a runner. In fact, running 50k in a month is going to be a genuine challenge for me but that's exactly why I've chosen to do it.

Pregnancy and baby loss have been part of my life for almost a decade. Since 2017, I've experienced two miscarriages, a pregnancy of unknown location and two ectopic pregnancies.

Both of my ectopic pregnancies ruptured and required emergency surgery, resulting in the loss of both of my fallopian tubes. My most recent loss was in January 2026. After discovering I was pregnant, I was admitted to hospital because doctors couldn't locate the pregnancy. My remaining fallopian tube ruptured while I was there and I underwent emergency surgery. I woke up no longer pregnant and knowing I would never again have the chance to conceive naturally.

That loss didn't exist on its own. It brought every previous loss, every hospital visit and every bit of grief I'd carried quietly over the years back to the surface. I've learned that grief doesn't follow a timeline and that pregnancy loss can change far more than the future you imagined. You grieve the pregnancy. You grieve the baby you imagined. You grieve the life you pictured and all the little moments that will never happen. And sometimes you grieve parts of yourself that you didn't realise you'd lost along the way.

I've walked out of hospitals carrying losses nobody could see. This September, I'll carry them with me for every one of those 50k. 

I'm doing this for my own losses, for the babies and futures that were imagined but never got to be and for every family who has had to walk out of a hospital carrying grief instead of the life they thought they were bringing home.

I'm definitely not promising an impressive running pace! I'm not even promising that I'll enjoy it. But I am promising to keep putting one foot in front of the other until I've completed all 50k.

If sharing my story and taking on something completely outside my comfort zone can raise money for Sands and help support other families experiencing pregnancy and baby loss, then every difficult step will be worth it.

For the families who know this grief.