I’m walking 100K in March for families facing baby loss
I’ve committed to walking 100K in March for every much-loved baby sadly not here today.
Sands ensure that everyone affected by the loss of a baby gets the support they need and deserve when facing the toughest of times. They campaign for change, provide training for midwives and healthcare professionals, and support research so that fewer babies die and so that less families experience the tragedy of losing their baby. Anything you are able to donate means so much.
Thank you.
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Holding Oliver: A Journey of Love, Loss, and 13 Years of Hope
Monday 9th FebHolding Oliver: A Journey of Love, Loss, and 13 Years of Hope
They say that grief is just love with no place to go. If that’s true, then the love we have for our son, Oliver, is vast enough to fill a lifetime.
Our journey to Oliver wasn't a straight line. It was a 13-year marathon marked by IVF cycles, surgeries, and the kind of quiet resilience only those who have struggled with fertility can truly understand. When we reached 25 weeks, we felt like we had finally beaten the odds. After some terrifying bleeds in December, the dust had settled. We felt lucky. We felt privileged. We were finally going to be parents.
The Week the World Changed
It is a cruel reality how quickly a life can change. On a Monday 10th March, a scan told us everything was okay. By Wednesday 11th March, a consultation shifted the ground beneath our feet - Oliver was measuring behind, and the word "underdeveloped" entered our vocabulary.
While I tried to cling to the silver lining, I could see the light dimming in my wife’s eyes. She knew. Mothers have a connection that defies logic and medical charts. On Thursday, March 13th, the specialist confirmed our worst fears: Oliver had passed away in the night.
March 15th, 2025
The days that followed were a blur of impossible decisions and a whirlwind of information. Two days after we said goodbye to our dreams for his future, we had to say hello to him in person. Oliver was born sleeping on March 15th, 2025.
People ask how we got through those days, the delivery, and the silence of the hospital room. To be honest? I still don’t know. There is no manual for how to birth a child you cannot bring home. You don't "get through it" with strength; you get through it because the clock keeps ticking and your heart somehow keeps beating, even when you wish it would stop.
Why We Share This
We are sharing Oliver’s story because 13 years of fighting for him matters. Those 26 weeks of carrying him matter. He wasn't just a "loss"; he was a son, a dream realized, and a person who changed us forever.
To anyone else navigating this silent club of baby loss, we see you. We are still in the blur, still wondering how we’re somehow standing — but we are standing. And so are you.
In loving memory of Oliver.
15th March 2025
https://fundraising.sands.org.uk/join/StepsForOliver
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