Becky Bromsgrove

Why I’m doing this challenge ❤️

I’ve decided to run 31 miles in may for sands. I started couch to 5k a few months ago and am actually enjoying it and thought i could incorporate the 2 goals together. 

As some people may know I have first hand experience of being on the receiving end of help from SANDS. On 29th July 2011 I gave birth to my stillborn son Alfie at the women’s hospital at 1:59pm. 

Going through a stressful time of finding a home and moving in and getting ready to have my baby I had experienced some reduced movements. As it was my first pregnancy I didn’t know what was normal and didn’t have anything to compare to so I just got on with everything else knowing I had an upcoming midwife appointment a few days later.  

My legs were severely swollen but as it was summer and I was on my feet a lot I put it down to that. I just felt awful but again I didn’t know what being pregnant felt like.  Fast forward a few days later and I went to the midwife. She took my blood pressure and the machine wouldn’t work properly but she put it down to the equipment. When she measured my stomach she said it was small but then when she tried to find the heartbeat there wasn’t one. 

She sent me to the women’s hospital to be checked properly and when I got there an ultrasound confirmed that Alfie had died. My body was that swollen that they couldn’t get any cannulas in me and I had to have a central line fitted in the main vein in my neck to get the medication in me that I needed to literally save my life. They told me I had pre eclampsia/borderline eclampsia my body was shutting down and my blood pressure was 230/190 and if they didn’t get it down fast I would end up having a seizure and dying.  

I couldn’t give birth to my son until they got it down and honestly it was the most scared I’ve ever been in my whole life. 2 days passed and my blood pressure was finally at a safer level and I was induced.  I gave birth to my son Alfie when I would of been 33 weeks pregnant  with the sun shining through the window and the lighthouse family - high playing on the radio and he was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. He was 3 lb 4 1/2 oz and 19 inches long.  We spent an hour or 2 with him after he was born and then I knew that it was time for me to say goodbye. 

A fantastic woman from SANDS came to visit me in my hospital room. She brought with her another woman from THE LEAGUE OF FRIENDS who gave me a memory box with a fire engine on the front. She said “all little boys love fire engines”. Inside were prayers and leaflets and things I could remember my son with. She gave me all kinds of information about the support they offer.

I didn’t leave the hospital empty handed the day I was discharged because I had my memory box.  I know I dont have my son but when I feel down or when I need to be close to him I look through it and it gives me what I need in the moment. 

This was just my story but there are millions of other women who have one similar and nowadays it is so rare to meet woman who hasn’t struggled with pregnancy or pregnancy loss. 

I went on to have Harry just over a year later so my story isn’t all sad but this may not be the case for a lot of other women. Even if you don’t donate to my page please just remember the good that this charity do and the support they offer and if you know of anybody who experiences something as horrific as pregnancy loss then please tell them about SANDS.  

I have never shown anyone my memory box but I have added pictures to show you some of the lovely things they did for me and what I have in it. 

When I think about my story I am not sad anymore. I’m proud of myself and how far I’ve came and after the rain comes a rainbow 🌈

ALFIE DEAN COOPER 29/07/2011